|EHULL ON HIS BEST BEHAVIOR|
Hello again everyone, I.B.Lyon here with this years World Series Champion Interview. I made my way to the Bite Me Pizza Resturant one of Burlington Vermonts finest establishments. Ehull was sitting at a table with a mound of cheese bread sticks -w- ranch dipping sauce. He smiled with ranch dripping from his lips, jumped up and shook my hand. " Welcome I.B, sit.....sit please!" I pulled a chair and parked my growing caboose directly across from Ehull.
We ordered 2 double Blantons on the rocks and I settled in for my first question. "Ehull " I said, " Congratulations on your World Series run. Is your team ready to repeat next year?" Ehull took a long drink and set down his plastic tumbler. " Man ! What The.....geez. Just let me enjoy this one...crap. I will assess my team after I sober up" I replied. "thats a fair statement..er... so let me take this time to ask you about some of your players?" Just then our supreme pizza with extra cheese arrived . Ehull was already tackling a slice and shot me a impatient glance. So I hurried and blurted out ." Kyle Romero had a monster series with 8 homers while driving in 18 RBI's, and hit .357. Next year is his last year of arb ,will you resign him to a long term contract?" Ehull washed down his slice with Blantons and said. " Thats a clown question man!! Of course,of course you idiot. Were going ink him up to a 4-5 year deal. He's young and has a ton of baseball yet to play.Next stupid question."
"Well I had to ask" said I " How about the pitching performance of Teddy Buckley?? He will be looking for a contract extension." Ehull was losing his patience and slammed his fist in the middle of a calzone causing sauce and cheese to squirt on the ceiling. "Listen I.B. I like you and I know it's gotta be tough working for that rube, Madmuldoon. But I can't let everyone know my buisness, THIS INTERVIEW IS OVER!!!". and with that he knocked his chair back against the wall and stormed off.
I sat there for several minutes soaking in the sauce and cheese dripping from the ceiling. I downed my drink and sheepishly walked out into the crisp Burlington air. Perhaps if Ehull took off one of his coats he would chill. But his team is hot and they sure don't have any use for the coats. Perhaps the only thing that will stop them is a World Series prediction from Madmuldoon.