WHAT IN THE WILD WILD WORLD IS GOING ON?

Simmy Been Downloaden

Editors Note: This article appeared on my other Blog in McCabe World. I thought you my readers in Wrigleyville needed to be informed of the crazy stuff going on.


Hello everyone I.B.Lyon here reporting on the strange stats and skewed records of some players. After several reputable owners and some not so. Complained about a few players with outragous records at the start of this season. Madmuldoon contacted me and urged me with a cookie of Crack Cocaine, to look into the strange going ons. After several puffs for energy I started at the source of all that we are. Yes thats right, What If Sports headquarters in beautiful Cincinatti Ohio.


I sauntered up to the front doors and was instantly met by 2 burly security guards who shook me down for drugs and money. Then after a painful taseing session I was handcuffed and ignored. Several owners have complained of this treatment when contacting customer support so I was not suprised. After a day passed I was stashed in the corner to be dealt with at the convenience of WIS customer service. It was then I noticed a new employee sneaking around the servers. I let out a rather loud Crack fart , he was startled and turned to see where the commotion and stench came from. People, I dont mind telling you that the blood I had left after my weekly donation to buy crack, ran cold. I was staring into the face of known Cyber-terrorist, Osimmy-Been-Downloaden.

Thats right my brothers. His little beady eyes and rat like facial features were staring at me like Whitney Houston at a Crack pipe. With the spiddle leaking out of the corner of his rat mouth he smiled and said. "Mr Lyons I presume. Looks like your caught in the quagmire of WIS customer service.And theres nothing you can do to stop me!" With that he slithered out of my site and even though I screamed for WIS staff to stop him. They added more cotton to their ears and ignored my pleas for help.

After what seemed like days the janitorial crew threw me out accidentaly and I was freed by a fellow dumpster diver. As you can see my fellow HBD'ers. We are under attack by the worst Cyber Villian to roam the halls of WIS and theres nothing we can do.He's one of them! So just pay your $25.00 and hang on. It's gonna be a bumpy ride.

Frosted Shock Squad Charms, they're magically delicious!

Shooter: Moonbats eat pieces of shit like Yorvit Delgado for breakfast!!!

Happy: Moonbats eat pieces of shit for breakfast?!?

Shooter: (after pregnant pause) NO!!!

Thanks for keeping the series exciting, Byung Hung Kim, errr... Yorvit Delgado. Salud!

3rd annual DUROCHER AWARD Nominee's

Thankyou for all the nominations. This was the best crop of nominees we could hope to have. I have the honor in introducing this years worthy nominee's. Anyone of them will represent Wrigleyville well . Not only through their fine organizations but also for their participation in the chats. Finally thanks to those that put my name up for nomination. I'm not ignoring your wish's , but I feel my teams record doesn't belong with this list of nominee's. If i added my name, one of these owners would have been left out. And I couldn't do that. Congrats to all nominees and now its time to vote in the left hand colunm. Great season everyone and you all better renew soon!!--MAD


DADDIOTHREE-  recieved several nominations. It's due to his great job on bringing the Muskellunges from obscurity to a contender. With a 66 million dollar payroll Daddio makes the most out of his squad. Right now they are 78-74 and are in the thick of the wild card hunt. Madison also could grab the division from the Bleacher Bums.Any way you look at it Daddio is a worthy nominee.This is what one owner had to say about Daddio: daddiothree for continuing to turn around that organization.


COACH34- Coach has his Shock Squad on the cusp of their first division crown. Playing in Wrigleyvilles toughest division ,that is a great accomplishment . Money can buy happiness in Scottsdale. 111 million dollars bought a 100 win season and the best record in the American League. His nomination came from many players and this is what was said of Coach "I can't beat this guy. This team is a juggernaught."


MARK3313- Our Commish not only fields one of the best teams in the league. This year we experienced a Crisis not ever seen in our tranquil world. And Mark handled it with class and quelled the disent within our ranks. We are very grateful to have a Commish like Mark.This is what was said of Mark: If he trades me Sosa I will vote for him. :) I wonder who said that..*wink*


EHULL11-  This nomination is also obvious. Since Ehull took over Burlington they have been one of the better teams in Wrigleyville. If it wasn't for Ralph's Crabbers, it could be said they would be division champs or World Series champs . Watchout for this team in the playoffs.The Coat Factory is for real. This is what was said by a nominating owner: "One of the best owners since coming into the league."


AARONWAYNE- I added a 5th nominee. Aaronwaynes accomplishments cannot be overlooked. He is on his way to a 5th consecutive division crown and a 4th 90+ season.He took over this Dog of a team 9 years ago and has made them into winners. This was said of Aaronwaynes team: The only team that has a chance against the A L south. "


Others recieving Nominations : madmuldoon, pbsilver,mdymond,hshack,rbedwell

THE WEEK IN WRIGLEYVILLE S-17 #8

TRADES
The MADISON MUSKELLUNGES traded Fonzie Bittle to the MINNESOTA MISFITS for Wayne Danks and Eugene King
Fonzi " Heyyyyyyy" Bittle is on his way back to Minnesota. The Fonzi was traded at the start of the season and rode the pine. So its back to the Misfits and maybe free agency. Madison picks up a couple prospects that will never be effective big leaguers. But they will eat some innings in the minors.


M L INJURIES
Antone Teagarden
Antone "Green" Teagarden was on the DL for 2 weeks with a strained forearm. I picked up this rookie from Arizona in a earlier trade. And since his promotion to the bigs he has had a great start until this. It's good to have this greenhorn back.

Al Zerbe
Another injury for the Totems. This one probably sunk my chances of getting in the playoffs.Perhaps he took exception to his Arb contract. You cant Preterb the Zerb!!

Tony Jang
The Knights will miss Tony 'Wang Dang Sweet Poon" Jang . He suffered a dislocated shoulder and will miss 4 weeks.Take it easy on the Poon ,Avantrael!!

Freddy Lawrence
Freddy "Got Fingered" Lawrence is a screwball pitcher, Of course. He will be out 3 months with Elbow Surgery. Olemiss outlawed Banging in the clubhouse.

Darren Baez
Darren "Groan" Baez  suffered a torn knee ligament and will miss just over a month. Nwsheehy could be heard singing "The night they drove old Dixie Down".

Vic Chavez
The Minnesota Misfits seem to be an appropriate name. Vic "Sick" Chavez will probably be out till next years all-star break. Then watch him be traded !! 

INTERNATIONALS

Che-Bang Martin Madison Muskellunges Age: 18 B/T: R/R Born: Yokosuka, JP Position(s): C View Hardball Dynasty Profile

Che-Bang will have a good minor league career as a DH.

Fausto Johnson Madison Muskellunges Age: 18 B/T: R/R Born: Rancho Viejo, DO Position(s): 2B View Hardball Dynasty Profile

2,4 miilion for this border line Major Leaguer. Some of these guys turn out good!

Albert Andrus Madison Muskellunges Age: 23 B/T: R/R Born: Cotui, DO Position(s): 3B View Hardball Dynasty Profile

Its not out of the question that this power hitter may see some time in the bigs to Pinch hit. But after roster expansions.

Miguel Tabaka Arizona Cobras Age: 18 B/T: S/L Born: Holguin, CU Position(s): RF View Hardball Dynasty Profile

3 million for this 1st baseman with speed and hitting skills.

Aurelio Armas Madison Muskellunges Age: 21 B/T: L/L Born: Mao, DO Position(s): RF View Hardball Dynasty Profile

will be a good AA/AAA player

Cristian Jang Charlotte Sometimes Age: 22 B/T: R/R Born: Sendai City, JP Position(s): P (LRA) View Hardball Dynasty Profile

AAA pitcher but a DITR bump on his splits will propel him to the Bigs.

Felipe Santiago Charlotte Sometimes Age: 18 B/T: R/R Born: Santiago, DO Position(s): SS View Hardball Dynasty Profile

A nice all around minor leaguer.

Jose Fuentes Charlotte Sometimes Age: 18 B/T: R/R Born: Hatillo Palma, DO Position(s): C View Hardball Dynasty Profile

Low level minor league catcher.

Harry Santiago Louisville Howlers Age: 20 B/T: R/R Born: Mao, DO Position(s): SS View Hardball Dynasty Profile

A defensive minor leaguer that gets to go to Spring training.

Harry Flores Louisville Howlers Age: 18 B/T: R/R Born: Navojoa, MX Position(s): 2B View Hardball Dynasty Profile

Good range .and also a spring traing minor leaguer.

David Lee Hartford Crushers Age: 20 B/T: R/R Born: Pueblo Nuevo, DO Position(s): SS/IF/OF/DH View Hardball Dynasty Profile

Picking up a nice defensive minor leaguer. Will help the innings count on the pitchers.

Fausto Rosa Hartford Crushers Age: 18 B/T: R/R Born: La Romana, DO Position(s): P (SP3) View Hardball Dynasty Profile

Minor league innings eater. Everyone is spending thier leftover prospect budget. Smart!!

Cristian Satou Jackson Black Bears Age: 18 B/T: R/R Born: Tokyo, JP Position(s): RF View Hardball Dynasty Profile

Olemiss was worried he'd have to eat his leftover prospect budget. But he signed a nice hitting prospect with 11 million of it. WHEW!!

Alexei Ortiz Boise Brown Sox Age: 18 B/T: L/L Born: Santiago De Cuba, CU Position(s): CF View Hardball Dynasty Profile

he will make a good AA Cf'er

Pedro Gonzales Boise Brown Sox Age: 19 B/T: R/R Born: Villa Mella, DO Position(s): LF View Hardball Dynasty Profile

Spendin the leftover and getting good value. good minor league hitter here.

Kelvim Martin Syracuse Moose Age: 18 B/T: S/R Born: Kobe, JP Position(s): 2B/CIF/OF/DH View Hardball Dynasty Profile

Mooses never Looses!!! Looks like they had the most leftover prospect budget.4.8 million bought this nice all around second baseman. A steal, he would have gone for 10 million plus.

A

FIRST TO 3000, IS IT

Our Commish thought it might be interesting to look at who might get to the magic 3000 hit mark first. And I agree. Mark put the accounting firm of Dewey Cheatum and Howe to work on some worthy canidates. And they came up with the first 4 on this list. I added one to make it 5 . Vote on who you think will hit 3000 first. Voting is to the left in the sidebar.

Billy Brown Helena Barking Moonbats Age: 34 B/T: R/R Born: Stockton, CA Position(s): 2B/CIF/OF/DH View Hardball Dynasty Profile

Oh Billy...Billy....Billy. Billy "Race The" Brown is already at 2,601 Hits. He averages about 188 hits per M L season . So he may reach 3000 in 2+ years.

Carlos Estrada Santa Fe Sergeis Age: 26 B/T: R/R Born: Tiverton, RI Position(s): 2B/1B/LF/DH View Hardball Dynasty Profile

This Youngster is only at 888 M L hits right now. But if Race the Brown falters, his average 178 hits per season will have him at 3000 in 12 seasons. Long shot but possible.

Roger Montana San Francisco Kickapoos Age: 25 B/T: S/L Born: Genoa, OH Position(s): 1B View Hardball Dynasty Profile

Roger "Broke Back" Montana is at 1,010 M L hits. Right now his average hits per season is at 202, but will climb with 19 games left on this season. It's easy to concieve he will hit 3000 in 9+ years.

Javier Sanches Charleston Tobacco Farmers Age: 22 B/T: R/R Born: Geneva, NY Position(s): 1B View Hardball Dynasty Profile

Javier "Peanut butter and Jelly" Sanches has 357 hits in only his second season. Alot will have to go right for this dark horse to make 3000.

Ignacio Sosa San Francisco Kickapoos Age: 33 B/T: L/R Born: Curiepe, VE Position(s): CF/3B/MIF/OF View Hardball Dynasty Profile

My pick is Ignacio "El Fuego" Sosa . He is currently at 2,274 M L Hits. He averages around 180 hits per season. He may get to 3000 in 4 seasons.

A

THE WEEK IN WRIGLEYVILLE S-17 #7

TRADES
The ARIZONA COBRAS traded Gus Grossman to the SAN DIEGO SALMONBELLIES for Wally Clark , Art Desmond and Chad Wood
#1 starting pitcher Grossman was traded for the second time. The Salmonbellies acquired his services for the stretch run.Arizona gets younger with 2 pitching prospects and a DH.


M L INJURIES
Stump Owens
The Stumpster is ready to get back on the field with the Kickapoos. His stiff neck has healed. 

Juan Pena
This Moose waiver claim broke his arm. The moose will have to find another closer.
Ramon Lo
It was a double whammy for the Moose. Lo will miss 2 weeks with a stiff neck. Lot of that going around.

Santo Prieto
My Big bat pinch hitter sprained a ankle. Probably walking to the Buffet table. He'll be back for more Vittles in 2 weeks.

Rheal Scott
Rheal "E?" Scott will miss 2 months with a broken arm.To bad for the peachfuzz.He Rhealy was having a great year.


INTERNATIONALS

Donaldo Matos Louisville Howlers Age: 20 B/T: L/L Born: Higuey, DO Position(s): LF View Hardball Dynasty Profile

1.3 million and a S/T invite for this already injured AAA player.

Julio Matos Wichita Wind Age: 18 B/T: S/R Born: Ciudad Obregon, MX Position(s): P (none) View Hardball Dynasty Profile

Thsi matos brother trew a wild pitch and injured the afor mentioned Matos.

Jae-Kuk Woo Syracuse Moose Age: 18 B/T: R/R Born: Otsuki, JP Position(s): P (SP1) View Hardball Dynasty Profile

3.6 million and a S/T invite for this M L mopup pitcher.

Angel Pineda Tampa Bay Stars Age: 22 B/T: S/R Born: Edo Lara, DO Position(s): P (ClA) View Hardball Dynasty Profile

Some rookie bullpen help.

Jacob Takahashi Jackson Black Bears Age: 18 B/T: R/R Born: Kobe, JP Position(s): 2B View Hardball Dynasty Profile

Having 11.4 million was good for the Blackbears. They picked up a very nice prospect by having the cash on hand.

Alfonso Amaral Tampa Bay Stars Age: 18 B/T: R/R Born: San Cristobal, DO Position(s): SS View Hardball Dynasty Profile

This defensive player should help the rookie pitchers.

Fausto Cruz Tampa Bay Stars Age: 18 B/T: R/R Born: Jarabacoa, DO Position(s): P (SuA) View Hardball Dynasty Profile

More rookie bullpen help.
A

THE SWISH LIST of ROOKIES

We’re at the point in the season where the Rookies are hitting the wall, if they haven’t already, so let’s have one last look at some guys who will make a push to be Rookie of the Year as the season comes to a close.

NL Hitters:
1. Peter Okajima (VC) – Okajima has slowed down just a bit but he continues to be a huge offensive force in the National League. He’s definitely getting my vote for NL ROY unless he gets injured.

2.  Khalil McNamara (SF) – A rookie putting up good numbers for a World Series contender always carries some extra weight. McNamara is making a late push since his promotion and could overtake Okajima with a strong finish. Twenty-five stolen bases in only 91 games leads me to believe that he might get to that 1,000 stolen base level that his teammate Sosa just hit.

3. Kyle Romero (WIC) – Tops for the NL Rookies in slugging % (.597), home runs (43) and RBI’s (98) and he’s #3 for hitters???!?!?!?! That tells you just how deep the rookie candidates are in the NL. No shame in coming in third in this race as Romero might end up being the best Rule V draft pick ever made.



NL Pitchers:


There is not a rookie pitcher in the National League that is putting up ROY-worthy numbers.


AL Hitters:
1. Michael Henry (HAR) – A darkhorse candidate when the season began, Henry has absolutely torn up AL pitching a la Mike Piazza. With 90 RBI’s in only 99 games and an OPS or 1.012 Henry is putting up amazing offensive numbers from the catcher position.

2. Darron Moses (BOS) – It must be the year of the catcher in the AL as Moses is another rookie catcher putting up great offensive numbers. It’s going to be a tight race between him and Henry coming down the stretch for AL ROY.

3. Carlton Sheets (FAR)/Ollie Greenwood (CH2) – Sheets and Greenwood both have very bright futures and I wouldn’t put it outside of one of them to make a strong push late in the season to become ROY. Sheets has been very strong defensively in left field while Greenwood has expectedly run into some issues in center field as he made the jump from AA but both should be strong offensive and defensive players for years to come.

AL PITCHERS:
1. Ivan Gimenez (MEM) – Gimenez has been strong this season in making 23 starts and holding his opponents to a batting average of .236 for a strong Memphis team. He’s been a very, very solid back of the rotation pitcher as this team pushes towards the playoffs.

2. Matty Guerrero (SD) – 21 saves in 23 opportunities is nothing to scoff at in this league as Guerrero has helped to close out games for San Diego. He’s averaging almost a strikeout per inning but could use a decline in his walks to help keep the stress levels low in the 9th inning.

3. Benji Martin (ARI) – 19 saves with a 2.65 ERA and 1.20 WHIP in 61 games for the Arizona closer. The Cobras aren’t winning enough games to get Martin the saves needed to win the ROY but he’s having a very fine season nonetheless.

THE WEEK IN WRIGLEYVILLE S-17 #6

TRADES

No Trades this week.


M L INJURIES
Jason Ransom
The Coat Factory called up the RF'er and he goes out with Hip Inflamation. Jason "For" Ransom will be back in 2 weeks....Maybe?

Michael Gardner

Austin lost their R-5 pickup for 2 months.To bad..this kid was having a great year.


Emmanuel Caseres
The Tabaky Farmers signed this unhealthy player for a year ,hoping that he could make it thru the season. NOT!! Out for 2 months. He will be a free agent next year for you Gamblers.

Rick Reagan
This misfit will take his yearly 2 week DL Break. He adds a broken Finger to his long list of injuries.

Don Nunnally
Poor Wylie...... This nice CF'er went on the DL for 2 weeks. Wylie was so distraught that he put this guy on the Waiver Wire. Will someone pick him up for the stretch run??

Al Pineda
Sordie Signed this cat to a big contract last year after he won the CY-Young. Now all of a sudden he can't make it thru an entire season without a injury. The Moonbats will need his arm to go far in the playoffs.

Sandy Hiatt
nwsheehy007 took another gamble on a sickly player. And..well......2-1/2 months with elbow tendinitis He only has 3 more years at 6.3 million per, left on his contract.


INTERNATIONALS

Kenshin Yamamoto Vancouver Totems Age: 18 B/T: L/L Born: Yokosuka, JP Position(s): P (SP4) View Hardball Dynasty Profile

8.2 million and a S/T invite for my newest prospect. While his Stamina and Control are a little low for my liking. He will need a good bullpen for wins. His splits and 2 pitches in th 90's may make up for his lack of innings pitched. Oh and he throws a 90 MPH Knuckleball....LOL

Wandy Frias Tampa Bay Stars Age: 18 B/T: R/R Born: Don Gregorio, DO Position(s): P (SP5) View Hardball Dynasty Profile

Minor Leaguer. A DITR bump could get him higher.

Yorvit Campos Burlington Coat Factory Age: 21 B/T: R/R Born: Laguna Verde, DO Position(s): P (SP1) View Hardball Dynasty Profile

This prospect has good projections until you get to the pitches. But at only 6.5 million . He's worth the gamble.

Raul Aguilar Trenton Toyotas Age: 18 B/T: R/R Born: Sonora, MX Position(s): P (SP3) View Hardball Dynasty Profile

6.1 and a S/T invite for this pitching prospect. His pitching Splits are Low for a ML'er but the other projections are nice, indeed.

Rick Newhouser Minnesota Misfits Age: 18 B/T: L/L Born: Zaragoza, ES Position(s): P (SP4) View Hardball Dynasty Profile

Rookie innings eater.

Cesar Berroa Arizona Cobras Age: 19 B/T: L/L Born: Boca De Soco, DO Position(s): P (SuB) View Hardball Dynasty Profile

At 5.5 million this bullpen prospect could be a steal. Nice projections all around and I bid on him. But after I signed Yamamoto there wasn't enough left in my prospect budget.

Rafael Morales Boise Brown Sox Age: 18 B/T: L/L Born: Cotui, DO Position(s): P (none) View Hardball Dynasty Profile

1.2 million for this prospect that has a good chance of pitching in the bigs.

Raul Tavarez Boise Brown Sox Age: 18 B/T: L/L Born: Boca Chica, DO Position(s): P (none) View Hardball Dynasty Profile

soxfan gets another decent prospect for 2 million.

Jair Olmeda Atlanta Peachfuzz Age: 18 B/T: R/R Born: Managua, NI Position(s): P (P) View Hardball Dynasty Profile

desanders spent 7.2 million for a very nice pitching prospect. Money well spent.