Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Sandleaguer Upset by Off-Season Manatee Bashing


In the weeks following the World Series several posts were seen with Manatee bashing as the theme. As an astute reporter, I brought this to Sandleaguer's attention. I caught up with the rotund owner of the Jacksonville franchise at his winter hangout "THE MANATEE BAR AND GRILL". A nice little place outside of Port St Lucie. He was bellied up to the raw bar and surrounded by empty shells and bottles of Arrogant Bastard Ale. So Sand," have you heard the latest out of WHIF?" He pushed himself back and mopped up the hot sauce that was dripping down his chin. No young fella I haven't heard but I am sure you are not here for the beer, So spill whats on your mind. I proceeded to explain that several owners had made statements to the effect "that the league had survived despite the fact that the Manatees were in it!" I had to take cover as shells and bottles went flying everywhere. He rose to his feet and bellowed: Who are these despots? I hesitated but knew I had to spill the tobacco juice. The Totems and the Spittoons I replied meekly. I also stated that they were circulating a Manatee poster. I laid a copy of it out on a table.

It appears that are opening a Manatee Butcher shop. He slogged down the rest of his ale and pondered where I might find these fine gentlemen. I stated last I heard they were in the Caribbean somewhere drumming up investors. With that he was out the door and I could hear him say I know exactly where they are and better hope I dont find them when I get there with some mumblings about a Spittoon for a hat and totem for a suppository. Have a great time in the new season everyone- Sandleaguer

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